Posted in Daily tally

Friday-and I bought a new coat.

One of my favorite things to do in the spring and summer is go to rummage sales/garage sales/jumble sales/whatever they are called where you are.  Today, I went with one of my good friends to the first rummage sale of the season. Woo! The first thing I saw was a black leather trench coat. I don’t know what made me stop and look-I generally breeze past stuff like that assuming it’ll be way too small.  But I looked and it *is* too small for me, by a little bit, but I bought that bitch anyway.  Why? Because by fall it won’t be too small anymore, dammit.

I’ve had a rough week with my headspace.  I’ve known that the euphoria of fresh change was going to settle into something more like routine, and that’s great, but this week (and I really think it was the stupid effing scale) is kicking my ass.

I can make a list of all the ways in which I feel so much better, stronger, more awesome. But the reality of how long this road is probably going to be is sinking in. Don’t get me wrong, I want to say right now that I’m up for it. This is a done deal, folks.  I’m just being upfront about the fact that this week, I’m not all that impressed with it. *hehe*  That’s why I bought a coat that was too small.  I want a visual reminder that the outside will catch up with the inside changes.

Another thing is-I’ve been kinda wallowing in this “omg, I’m still fat?!” mentality this week, and this morning I got a text from someone that was full of encouragement and all sorts of other feels and it made me kinda verklempt because she’s been nothing but amazing and solid and encouraging, and I have no idea how just say “Hey, thanks!”   How ridiculous we get that we *reflexively* want to argue with someone who tells us we’re awesome.

Anyway, I know that I’m going to have ups and downs and ins and outs, and I think I’m gonna spend the weekend pointing out to myself all the ways in which my life is better for these changes I’m making even if I never lose another pound.

Now I’m gonna find something that has nothing to do with typing. 🙂 See everyone Sunday night!

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Author:

Artist and owner of Bramblefae Boutique. I design whimsical jewelry, I like good writing and good games.

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